Let’s Talk about Reckitt’s Crown Blue.

 Welcome back and thank you all for your support. 

I struggled with what topic I wanted to discuss this time around because there are so many things to talk about and such a limited time, so I will discuss what I can and everything else will fall into place.

So let’s get to it shall we!!!

First things first I would like to talk to you about how to deal with relatives, family, friends that feel like you are doing something negative because you choose to understand the reason that you are here in this realm.

 I will use myself as a example.

My mom bliss her heart, is a die-hard,go hard or go home Jesus believer, Bible thumping fan.She raised us up in Christianity and we were always taught that  Jesus was the way to heaven and anything outside of that is a ticket to Hell.

 My mom likes to tag me in these gospel skits, sometimes they are funny and sometimes they are not and even though my mom knows that I have not attended church consistently in over 14 years,or that I do not wish to attend church nor do I wish to  have a pastor but she keeps trying on the slick….lol….

 I guess that’s the down fall of Facebook..Everyone has one.( Including jesus)


 Recently i sent her some protective salts,and forgot to include instructions…*Face palm* now if there is one thing you should know is that salt are for protecting and banishing. 

The first question she asked was “What is this, this ain’t No Hoodoo is it?

My home made Black salt, to Banish all evil.

 I am from Louisiana , and  our history goes back deep on that land and when people speak of Voodoo, or hoodo as they like to call it ,you are told to steer away from people like that. Problem is that we are people with many gifts, and our gifts should not be made for us to feel ashamed. I honestly believe this is the cause of a lot of depression, hurt and anger in the world. But I digress

In any essence I would never try to put anything on anyone especially without their permission, that’s not how I work. I am very loving and protective of the people that are in my immediate family, so my first thought is “If I know something why not let them know”. All the while they are thinking that I’m over here praying to some Satan, and worshipping devils. Wow!!!! This is people that have known me all of my life, all of a sudden they feel like I am evil. To my mom(Love you Mom) No it’s not Hoodoo, it’s protection from Hoodoo and Your welcome!

When it all comes down to it, and when everything is said and done, We are all doing the same thing, we’re just doing it to different deities.(Yes Jesus is a deity). 

 And although I am not here to change anyone’s religion, I would hope that it is the same for those that choose to check in and see what I’m posting on a daily basis. The way you feel about me is none of my business and so I respect that and would hope that you respect my views.

Okay so that was my little rant for the week!

I do have one recommendation in this blog, and if you have made it this far you deserve what I’m about to speak about.  Simply like this blog here, share it on your page, and comment,& I will send you a free Ricketts Crown Blue.

 I am only giving away 10 so if you’re interested better hop to it, go ahead and read on to understand the great benefits of this awesome little tablet.

Reckitt’s Crown Blue

Removes Negative Energy,Bad Juju, Unwanted spirits.

This little gem is used by High Priestess, Spirit workers, healers, shamans and the like also known as “Blue Water”  such workers would keep a bowl or jar out in the corner of their home or work space to keep evil spirits away . 

 Is also safe to use with laundry and in spiritual baths, it does not contain dye or bleach .  Also is used for Gamblers luck.

 Saging is great for light negative energy however if you have something more stubborn and evil, or a really bad spirit you have this as an option and there is no smoke involved.

Use safely for laundry or spiritual baths.


In my quest to find more suitable removal options for my home, I have come across making my own Florida water and so many wonderful tonic’s but sometimes those options are not available as I have a newborn and since smoke can really bother him, here is what happened when I use this wonderful little tablet.

First thing you want to do is get a glass, or ceramic bowl or jar. I decided to use a mason jar as I tend to favorite those.

Second thing you want to do is make sure the jar or a bowl that you were using has been cleansed and purified,then you simply take the Reckitts break it up, place 1/8th of a tablet for ever quart of water in your bowl or jar. It is activated by either hot or cold water so it really does not matter which one you use.

 Place your water in the bowl with the reckitts and take your hand and either place it over or inside the bowl or jar and begin to imagine as you stir clockwise that your family is being protected .

Imagine your home is being rid of negativity, that no negativity, evil or any type of bad energy is allowed into your home, you want to send all negative energy attempting to enter a big stop sign.

Tell the water what to do, and make sure that you are visualizing as you are staring in a clockwise motion.

 When you have said what you needed to say and you feel that there is nothing left to say take the bowl or jar and place it in a corner somewhere where you feel the most negative energy resides. Leave it therefore a day and when you’re done you can take it and flush it down the toilet, or you can rid it by pouring the solution on a tree and it shall grow into something beautiful.

I would not recommend pouring down the sink as it could come back up on you so rid yourself of it carefully.

Here are photos or of the jar I did and though I smudge  fairly often there was still some gunk on my home… 

Her are the end results of my cleasning!!

 Gross right????

  Often times energies can be stubborn and smudging only pisses them off, In that case there are so many things that you can do to protect yourself in your home.  Once you rid your home of the negative energy that impedes on your space, you can then begin to look into other things in order to keep your home free and clear.

 Here are a few herbs that have protective qualities, some of them you may already have on your cabinet but are not activating to assess their full potency, yes the list is accessible through Facebook nut it is very accurate, of course I will address this topic in a later blog but for now here you go.

May the longtime sun shine on you my friend, until we meet again.


Smudging: The Art of Saging.

Hi loves,

 I know it’s been a minute but I’m back with some very interesting NEWS!!!! First and foremost I want to say that even though I had planned on going to the beach for my BIRTHDAY sadly it didn’t happen, (😔😔😔😔) but I’m okay with that as I do understand that later will be greater. 

On that note for my birthday I had a very beautiful Cajun meal at a Louisiana spot here in Houston ducked off over in the heights area. I saw the most beautiful plants at this location and took a picture that I would like to share with you.

 Such a lovely site isnt it?!?!? It really did calm my anxiety about the whole issue, although I wasn’t to distraught about it because I knew that there was a possibility that we were not going to make it,and with that in mind let’s get to the topic for the week.

Smudging The Art of Saging

 Generally I Sage the most during a waning moon, If you’re not familiar with the moon phases you can easily check out and number of websites that will explain to you its phases, however this article is not typically focused on that topic.

When the moon is waning it is decreasing and therefore is the best time for this type of maintenance, I have found that doing this more while Moon is waning leaves my home free and clear for any work  that is necessary to flow during new moon , Now this is not to say that I do not Sage while the Moon is waxing it just so happens that I do this less during this time.

I partake in a banishing or clearing ritual at least once a week up until the Darkmoon ,where I like to give it a big shebang and do any major spell work during the this time. These rituals can be as simple as, taking my cleasning bath anywhere from 3 to 5 days, and of course I give myself plenty of time before the new moon to do this. 

 Anytime you are banishing and clearing for yourself is a good time to do for your home, doing this can range anywhere from sweeping your home of all negative Energies, washing your floor with a magical floor wash, saging your home anywhere from 3 to 5 days anytime before the dark moon, or cleaning around your windows in order to sprinkle fresh black salt to keep negative energy from entering your home.

 Financial blessings, new love, or calming the atmosphere in the home. No matter what your target or reasoning for wanting to clear the space in your home, it’s always the best time during a waning moon.

If you choose not to clear your home you leave yourself and your space without any defense, and when you are not sure what’s lurking can be an explanation as to why what you put out into the universe has not come into fruition,so it’s safe to say that it is important to do what is necessary.
Simple right? 

If you are not sure what type of energy is lurking in your home, this is understood by simple way of recall. Ask yourself these simple questions ..

Do you feel stressed out in your home? 

Are you sad or feel sad when entering ? 

Do you cry and have panic attacks say in a certain room in the home?

 Is someone in your home having nightmares?

 Do you hear loud bangs and bumps when there’s no one else in the home? 

These are all important things to know and more importantly where you should focus when clearing your space.

There are many different types of herbs that you can smudge with, more than likely if you watch the Youtube video, Google a article on smudging, or if you’ve been passed down the knowledge from your ancestors then you are familiar with White sage.

White sage:

There are so many wonderful things to be said about white sage, more importantly it is best to note that it is best for removing negative energy such as sadness, or the energy after you’ve had an argument with your spouse,partner or anyone in your home. 

My Example;

I know sometimes when I am feeling lazy, or in a really nasty funk I will light some Sage and use my Feather fan to focus on specific areas where I feel the most negatively….Most of the time it’s about washing my dishes, LOL. I am sorry but there are so many people in my home and I am always in the kitchen washing dishes. It really is the dread of my life, so I sage  myself and it gives me a quick pick up and soon I’m done with the dishes ready to move on to somthing else.

( I have to insert a disclaimer here, if you are pregnant saging is not recommended, I remember the one time that I did try it when I was pregnant with Christopher and If I tell you I had a headache for 2 days. I honestly could not get rid of that headache. You should go with a more gentle option in order to cleanse and clear your space,before you cleanse your space please do more research to find out what would work best for you.

 on the Lighter Side I’ve heard some of my witchy sisters make reference to Sage spray, magical floor washes, and Florida water. Again I reiterate that there are so many options you simply need to look up a few different sources to make the connection.


 Something else I generally like to use when I’m smudging my home is Palo Santo,This wonderful little miracle bark is so powerful.
Palo Santo is what you would use to remove a more stubborn type of energy such as evil eye, hexes, curses, any type of psychic attacks that you feel. I have to admit when I first begin burning Palo Santo I was overpowered by the scent, it was definitely something for me to get used to and it was new to my little family. You would use it the same way as you would white sage and the same method.


 Something that has become more common and my magical use is the use of a Feather fan. This is a technique that is used to spread the smoke in a wider area much faster.
One thing you don’t want to do is be stuck walking around the room without something to help push the smoke in much-needed areas as sometimes a specific area (usually the corners of the room) need a little extra attention.
In the beginning I used to walk around with one feather and this work perfectly fine for me as at that time, I was not knowledgeable as how to craft my on feather fan and the prices for some of those fans can be quite pricey. I can be a little extra, but usually I like to add my own sass.Recently I began crafting my own feather fans, just so that I could lace my own intention and Power into them, some fans (as beautiful as they are) seem to be quite boring to me.

When I am clearing my home of negative energies I am usually inviting my ancestors,Spirit guides,Archangels and African deities into my home so I felt compelled that when making my own feather fans to add some color and give it some pop.
If you are interested in receiving a feather fan of your own, you can check them out in my Etsy shop, they’re usually quite reasonable and not as elaborate as some that are 35 Plus dollars. I generally try to make them simple but elegant,and if you have any questions or concerns or maybe just general ideas you can email me at RCaldwell8119@gmail.com.

Another disclaimer I should insert is to always give negativity a way to escape, when I am saging my home I usually have the windows closed unless the kiddos are in the hall, other than that I leave the windows and doors closed so that the smoke can saturate each and every crevice that I am focusing on and after a few minutes I will open all windows that I have access to, and even crack the doors.

  Saging can be just as strong as 16 people smoking cigarettes in your home so  you want to give the smoke a chance to clear the air. 

Always use fire safety.

 Please have a container such as an abalone shell or something to carry with you while you Sage, because you are burning a natural herb there tend to be ashes,So dropping them is inevitable.

Last side note, you can use dried rosemary dried mugwort, and a host of other Herb’s in order to smudge your home, white sage works best for me and Palo Santo at least twice a month keeps the air clear in my home and the communication lines open. When practicing your craft, make it your own and don’t let anyone tell you what is best. Trust your intuition it is something that we all have and something that we all can apply at any particular time in our life.

Well loves that is all for now, if you like this article please do me a big favor and share it with someone on your timeline that you love, you can also go like my page on Facebook @Roshasway, and leave a comment while you’re there.

Here is the Exciting news!!!!

My Etsy shop will be up within the week (fingers crossed) so you can make reference when needed. 

I have to tell you I’m so excited about the Itsy shop, and you never know what you’re going to find there because I am a crafty mom I am always crafting up something new. I hope you find something that tickles your funny bone, or tingles your witch  bone.

May the longtime sun shine upon you my friend, until we meet again. Namaste

Magical Time for Cancer, New Moon!

As i have said from the beginning, I am not a professional writer but i am a great Shaman Women. I have been healing myself and my family for many years.. I believe all mothers are Shaman weather they believe it or not.

When we look at the word shaman there are many definitions however it all translates in to a healer, a person able to communicate with the other side and although for some that may mean doing something either evil or not up to their standards is really” None of my Business… Yes.!” I said it and meant every word, and for those that know me will tell anyone that does not that “I dont put on a pony and dance show” and i am not going to pretend that the world is all Roses and chocolates.

Shamanism is what a mother does not what everyone else says that it is, i wont apologize  for being who i am, i have nothing to prove and there for no one to prove it to. Neptune’s Retrograde is about veils being lifted but instead of wasting energies with those that dont, in have to help those that do…


Cancers The Sun is Back!!!!!!!!And so is Mars!


We are in the spotlight with so much to be grateful for, Abundance abundance abundance!!!!! First off  Mars is back until the 20th of July so lets all enjoy that stamania, vitality, energy,sensual energy.

I can attest to feeling like a lovely little flower myself lately but i also enjoyed the energy of the Strawberry Full moon that we just had On June the 9th and when i tell you but was magnificent it was all that i needed to sweeten up the year. I got so much done, I moon bathed a my crystals, made some very powerful moon water, Money and love oil , made a few kits and worked on my jewelry which will be here in my store as soon as we can get everything up and listed.

I mean i really had so much energy to be creative, and because of zodiac being Cancer i willfully create the most in the kitchen(again shaman workings) As i write now i am make my powerful chia Tea for my family because of summer allergies.

So when celebrating summer solstice there are few things that I recommend doing just in order to bring in the season right, With the different planets moving Direct  and in retrograde June brings us to Neptune in retrograde.

For the next six months we will be feeling the effects of this specific planetary retrograde. When Neptune is direct there is a dreamy sort of glare like those Cheesy Glamour shot picture we used to take in the 90’s …You know, really romantically blurred and the like there’s a veil over our face and we’re in a dream like state.

However Neptune’s retrograde is not as harsh as we would say Mercury, I remember when Mercury was in retrograde a lot of the people that I communicate with on a normal basis we’re having trouble especially in the field of communication. That’s because Mercury in retrograde means chaos whether it’s cell phone communication, computer communication, personal or business. However Neptune retrograde is a time where the veil is lifted.

This is a time where we are gently nudged to do instead of think and daydream can feel like a time where everything is strained but really what Neptune is asking us to do is look at the situation for what it is and not what we dreamed it to be.

As Goddess it is my job to take time to look at the situations as it really is, one aspect that i always return to no matter the situation is Yoga.  Yoga has always been a place of rest, my mat welcomes me no matter the mood i am in, its a place to just be.

Crystal’s,  yoga, meditation and opening my charkas activate all those beautiful natural energies in me,i have always known them as they are DNA encoded.

New Moon happening on June 24th 2017( HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOM!) since summer is here i thought i would talk about a few things to Help with the Transition.


Start this one off with a cleansing Bath in sea salt preferable . Salt as a whole no matter which it is is always about banishing negativity and bad Juju however, different salts have different uses and different thing added. Be sure of what is being emitted in your purification/ cleansing bath  you should :

1.) Either make the Salt mixture yourself

2.) Buy from a trusted source

I say this because if you dont know what in your mix you can not be sure of what your targeting, this advice is simple for me as i love to mix and shake and stir and bounce, all sounds so Sexy to me! YASSSS Blitch!

Which brings me to my next point!!!


This is very important because often times we dont understand how we pick up other people energy which can stay with us and that could bring up all kinds of things that your may not understand or know where it comes from. I have heard this principle in my up bringing which was (Christian) but since i dont subscribe to that religious aspect i get the infamous (she crazy side eye).

 Crystals– I am a big fan of having a stone or crystal that purify all stones you bring into your space,such as Selenite {which activates the Third Eye (6th) and Crown (7th) Charkas}. Selenite is great because it gives access to the spirit realm and spiritual communication,  when it comes to clearing the air and charging your stones, ‘Selenite will get you right.” 

I also keep a Clear Quartz in my home and preferable one in your purse. Now depending on what kind of Quartz you choose to have one thing to always keep in mind is that quartz is about magnification and amplification,knowing the power for which it posses  will also help to bring a clear meaning of its use.

Protection, Banishing negativity, Purification: Use stones such as  Golden Healer, Spirit quartz,Shun-gite,Moldative, and Pink Halite. 

Transformation,Inner light and Joy, Evolution, spiritual knowledge and wisdom: Use Natrolite, Azeztulite, Moonstone,Moldative,Lemurian Seed Crystal, Shiva Lingam.

Passion,Fire,Courage,Creativity,Sensuality,Sexuality,innovation, strength and vitality : Carry stones like,Carnelian,Ruby,Orange Calcite, and Fire opal.

Herbs have magical properties which is the reason when used is stead of  say; Table salt will not only add the flavor of that herb but will also infuse the oils of the Herb which is magical in itself, also natural elements  such as grave yard dirt and many other things that are accessible to you and though some will not agree with me I believe that if you know the use for anything natural dealing with light work then know how to use it and you do what you feel  not what some rules say.

Here is my Disclamer :I do not Follow any type of religion because its not who i am, i am accountable to self and to be mindful of what this being does. It is not my intention to represent any ones religion.

I use the spiritual technology that is avaliable to me, one will have issues with outside influence but when you know what to do it because second nature. There is no need for me to ignore what I have known to be true will not ring true for all.

Mars oh Mars up among the stars after 2 years you grace me with your open arms

Feeling Frisky???

Right now we are getting tremendous support and cheers from the universe ,it is the time to aim high and go for your hearts desires for the fact that you have the support you need and no other is needed, what you want will come so get ready. If your area of growth is that you need to work on your personal goals such as better relationship or finances in order. Don’t procrastinate Get up and MOVE .

Also Jupiter and Venus will bring major improvements in the house of finance and chosen field , Legal Document or litigation should be handled outside of court.  If you must engage just be careful of what you sign as it could come back to haunt you.

Also lets be mindful in the health department to watch your sugar levels,blood pressure and ears be sure to handle as soon as you notice that something is wrong.

My Born day on the 28th of June will bring me back here and please bear with me while i I am revamping my site, bring lot of information that i have soaked up over the years . I don’t have a fancy pictures and bells and whistles just yet, but keep watching I promise it will get interesting. 

“If you feel like this information was helpful for you, then there are at least two who could benefit too, please share this with someone who loves you.

And so it is!

Changing this page for the good.

Hello all, and thank you for checking in with my blog. I come to you today as humble as I know how, and I know that this blog was made two honor my son however I feel it calling to share my practices here. 

Those of you here now have no idea of who I am or how I came to be and I decided I should share. My parents named me Roshanda s Caldwell and I have always been honored to carry that name however about five years ago I felt the need to change my name, and become the real me.

 I try my hardest not to infringe my belief system on anyone who is not attracted to or already involved in the lifestyle but there are so many great things about being a goddess. I felt this calling when I was a young child and at the tender age of 17 I begin practicing yoga with my first teacher by video, his name was Alan finger. I loved practicing with him because he was very gentle and although I never met him in person I felt his connection with me when I began practicing by video. 

I am now 36 years old and will be 37 on the 28th of June(CANCER LYFE) and although I have gone through periods where I decided I did not want to practice, or life was too hard for me to practice I have always felt the need to come back to the mat which in turn leads me to my goddess practice. 4 some that know me on a personal level it is hard to understand why this choice had to be made, but I sincerely feel that when it’s time to make that specific change in your life it will happen naturally. My whole life I have suppressed my gifts for being a spiritual being simply because of my ur bringing as a Christian funny thing is I always knew something was wrong with that for me. Now I never try to change anyone’s Faith or religion as I do not believe anyone should try to change mine, but my intention has always been to help my family and friends when called upon. 
There are times when the energy to be me was low as I had gone through depression since I was a little girl and did not know that I was suffering from depression and I also realize that I suffered because of suppression of my gifts and therefore I will no longer do or allow that. 

Therefore comes the change in my blog, I am hoping to post more as I have began to wined myself in all of my gifts instead of running from the mat, I now run to the mat. Instead of running from the fact that I am a kitchen goddess I now run to the kitchen when it’s time to help myself my family or my friends to move forward. It can be hard living on this Earth and trying not to allow evil to penetrate your forcefield, I learned early on that stones and crystals help me and they helped me to be able to clarify what I’m feeling on the inside, to magnetize my feelings and to validate my path. 

So comes the opportunity to walk that path exactly, Rosha is all about being a goddess and even though I answered my call later in life I had always practice and been on this path no matter how I wavered. I plan to post more of my work, spells, rituals and tips to help my fellow goddesses who have answered their call later in life to become more goddess like period that may sound funny to some but to those who are meant for the path it will be very clear,and I have some very simple advice for you. 
This is your life be who you want to be unapologetically and make no excuses for that. Because I also incorporate yoga into my practice it will also be included in my blog as over the years I have met many Yoga rock stars which have influenced me such as Donna farhi, David Swenson and the like I wont name drop too much I will simply state that each and every person that I have come into contact with on this beautiful paths have helped to influence me to become the better me. 

In this blog bye allowing myself to breathe relate, relax, and release and my advice is that you learn to do the same. I tend to end my sessions by sending so much love and light hence  I will do here… walk in the light and in order to receive you must give. Love is The Ultimate Gift so give it freely and give it often. Namaste!

His name is Chris

So after having all my test ran they all came back normal, so basically i had Edema… My feet would not go down and this was months befor i was to give birth, i know i know” Every pregnancy is different”.  So  i took it for what it was and decided i would rest as much as possible bacuse i couldnt really walk on them, the tops and bottom were both so swollen that my feet were constantly sore.

I know, I know every pregnancy is different.

Christopher was due on Feb.12,2017 but i knew this befor any doctor told me , i mean with the technology avaliable at your finger tips its aslmost possible to perform surgery on your self and no matter how extreme that sounds , it is truth. The funny thing is that i had a feeling very early on that he would try to come on Valantines Day, i was somewhat correct in my thought because he decided to wait until Feburary 15, 2017 to make his grand entrance. I remember feeling worst than i had felt in months, i had the worst headache, my body was tired, back ached,breast so sore and my son was 4 days Post term. I was ready! i had two more days until i would be induced and i had everythig packed and ready to go.. at some point I knew it was time and I’m glad things unfolded the way that they did because I was feeling very tired and sick on the morning of February 15th right after Valentine’s Day, which I did not have a good one so I was in a bad mood from the day before period but I think that I was just ready I will say that my family is so thoughtful that for Valentine’s Day they bought me chocolate covered strawberries which are my absolute favorite and so even though I did not eat them on the 14th I managed to scarf them down the morning of the 15th I should have known then that it was time for me to go to the hospital.

 I waited around lunch and my husband came home to make a long story short I called the doctor and of course the assistant claims that I may just be having false labor, but I had to explain to her that I had been through this process twice and that I was over 40 weeks, so she tells me to come in and before she could even get a really good feel she said” oh yes you are ready, do not pass go, go straight to the emergency room.”

 It’s a good thing that I knew that because I had my bags already in the truck and off we went. My husband is a very calm guy so he was able to drive me and we were excited, we were finally going to see the Son that we so long for. And I was tired of carrying around his heavy butt. Now I never received an epidural with my first two pregnancies partially because I didn’t know what I was in for the first time and the second time I waited too late, but this time I had decided since it was my last time I didn’t want to go through the hell and hurt ….if I had only known. 

Everything is fine I get checked in by the sweetest nurse I believe she was an African lady and I just adored her, she was very calm and she kept encouraging that I was doing very very well. That’s always good to hear when you’ve got shooting pains from your front of your abdomen to the back of your abdomen all the way through to your pelvis and tailbone, and my husband still so calm getting me a towel for my head and such. So after getting checked in the nurse asked me if I was going to receive an epidural and without hesitation I told her “YES” , I knew that I did not want to go through any heavy pain but when we got there it was 4 o’clock and after going through all of my test getting me hooked up to monitors and making sure I’m not allergic to anything in the epidural comedy anesthesiologist comes in at 7:15. Mind you when they checked me before I went to the hospital I was already 6 centimeters dilated and so by now I am in full swing mode but hell I just wanted to pain go away. It was the most horrific pain I have ever felt in my entire life for the third time I asked myself what am I doing, am I dying??

 I received the meds and although the pain was numb the pressure was even worse for me, I could feel the nurse pulling and pushing on all of my naughty parts and they did not feel so naughty, they felt abused like someone was kicking me. But I knew it was all for a good cause, I can still feel the pressure as the nurse tells my husband that it’s time and calls for the doctor. All of this over me screaming help let’s go, get it out of me, is it time yet, oh my God this hurts so bad.. He came along at 8 p.m and out the gate he causes a disturbance, he pooped inside of me,he peed on the doctor, and he came out screaming. It was like he was telling her” oh no lady you don’t have to hit me on the butt I’m alive.” I could hear him crying over the heartbeat and blood that I could also hear rushing through my body, I heard the doctor scream that the baby had a lot of hair which would explain while I had a lot of heartburn.

 I was glad and ready to see him, I looked over at my husband’s face and he had the most beautiful smile. He was proud and so was I. I could not wait and when they finally brought him over to me, I laughed to myself because his eyes were already open he was looking directly at me. That’s the first picture that you see in the blog about complicated Chris, you see me holding him and a blanket and him looking at me with those eyes like what the hell is going on? I must admit my fingertips and most of my body were numb, my feet are swollen my who who was dead,I could not walk, I was starving , and all I wanted to do was get some sleep. Problem with that is when you’re in the hospital they’re always coming in the room for something, to poke you or to poke the baby, to check you or to check the baby, to see if your breastfeeding or to see if the baby had enough to drink and as tired as I was I was not in the mood to be bothered every few minutes out of the day. 

The only thing that matters is that he was here and I was ready to bring him home, I had no idea what I was really in for because I had it so easy with my first two pregnancies I thought this baby would be a breeze to and boy was I wrong!!!!!

Geststional Diabetes?!?!

( I am very new to bogging so please be patient with me that i may become as versed as a professional)


Considering the fact that I had had my daughters in my mid-twenties here I was again trying, hoping, waiting to find out exactly what I was carrying. I believe this is when a mild and very subtle depression begin to kick in because I begin to feel sad, I had no energy to get up and do anything. My feet were swollen and I had these constant excruciating headache that were very difficult in the beginning but when I begin to take a prenatal they begin to subside however I still got them maybe two or three times a week.

So it’s now the middle of December of 2016 and my appointment is set up for right after Christmas break and I was okay with that, I was really glad that I would finally get a chance to be seen constantly through my pregnancy.  This is when I also begin to think that something else was wrong with me like maybe I had developed gestational diabetes, anyone who has diabetes knows that it is a serious condition and I’ve never had any major health issues in my younger life and so I don’t plan on doing blood testing on my arms and fingers for the rest of my life.

The day finally arrives and I am more than ready ,to be honest with you I know they’re going to tell me that I have some horrible condition like ketoacidosis or some form of diabetes. I wake up early jump in the shower and get dressed like I don’t have anything growing anywhere inside of me, when I look back at the situation I was screaming for help. Even though I put on a huge front like I wanted to have a natural at home or in a birthing center because at home is not safe, I have to tell you I was scared to death.

All I wanted to do was make sure everything was okay, so I jump in my car and get to the doctor’s office and was seeing fairly quickly and because it was right after Christmas break a lot of people did not have appointment so this gave me the perfect opportunity to be seen and to be screened as much as I need it.

The only problem I have with the center that I chose was for the fact that you never saw the same doctor twice, sometimes you saw a nurse practitioner, sometimes you would see a midwife and other times you saw the doctor other than that I was highly satisfied with the place that I chose to receive obstetrics care.

They call my name maybe 5 minutes after I got there and finished my paperwork and as we walk down this long hallway I began to feel a little queasy, and the nurse asked me for my sample of course I obliged and soon was dressed in that old so comfortable game that we all love to wear that you can’t close the back to.

I decided to take a deep breath and be happy that I finally will get the attention that I need comma I wait about another 5 minutes and in comes a really nice older woman of Eastern descent, she is very kind and warm and listen to every rent that I had about every issue that I had, that she asked about, I am sure she thought to herself “will this woman ever stop talking”? However  she listened and she smile gingerly, informing me that she was now going to proceed with the exam. She does so and sends off my culture, i grab my keys run to my car and thank the High Heavens that I can finally get some answers.

It 10:30 in the morning and I am starving!



My First Blog



So here I am on WordPress and I’m excited about it and yes the name of my page is complicated Chris because it’s based on the experiences that I’ve had with my most recent pregnancy of my only son.

I have two daughters they will be 11 and 10 this year and for some odd reason my husband and I decided that we wanted to have another baby a son what I did not realize when we made this decision was that I would have many complications with my son that we’re not to be seen by the medical eye but to be experienced in my physical and spiritual bodies.

My son was born February 15th of 2017 this year  and I had the date down pack from start to finish because we had planned this one unlike the previous two my complications begin at the beginning of the pregnancy comma unbeknownst to me I was still working out of the home at that time and was actually informed by my husband that I was pregnant because his eating habits have changed. I should have known right then and there that this was going to be a hell of a walk. In mid-august I decided it was time for me to stop working and to be with my family full time, and I tell you I am so glad that I did because I was sick my whole pregnancy. Morning sickness never went away and I swelled like a big balloon with a ton of helium, but I was okay with that as long as my baby was healthy and the slight chance that we were having a boy was also exciting. Funny thing is I did not know I was pregnant with a boy until I was close to giving birth, I pushed through anyways. Because my situation was a little complicated I received prenatal care when I was about 20 weeks along. I would never forget the day because I had complications even with seeing the doctor but I got things handled and was able to reschedule for the same day at a different Clinic. Of course the doctor ordered all of the standard test for pregnant woman and when we went to do the ultrasound for the first time my son was not cooperative. He was laying on his side and we were not able to see any of his extremities and of course he was just a 20-week fetus which made it all the more complicated. I and 35 years of age and with that comes complications so my doctor ordered me to go and have a more accurate ultrasound, little did I know that appointment I would never make. You don’t understand a different pregnancy until you go through the full pregnancy therefore I should have known at that particular time that I was having a boy because everything not just inside but also on the outside was complicated. I became frustrated over the next couple of weeks and felt hopeless about the situation but I never gave up because I wanted to make sure that my baby was healthy. The one good thing that I did get from that first visit though was a prescription for prenatal vitamins which I had not taken during my previous pregnancies and had not started taking during this one. I also understand that I put myself in a lot of these situations and could have totally handled the situation differently but my son is here now and I have so many stories to tell about him, no matter what issues that I may have had while pregnant and those that I continue to have in my post term I consider myself one of the luckiest woman in the world. Stay tuned for the rest of my story as I’m sure it will become more and more interesting with each post. Thank you so much for taking the time to read my first blog I am truly hoping that my story will help someone that may be going through what I went through and if that is the case then I am more than happy to share with you all.
Peace, love, and light to you all